Earth to Madonna – You’re not British

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I’m certainly not doing the Biennale, the Venice Film Festival, the way everyone else is. I’ve missed all the big premiers and I told my husband that I just wanted to see as many Italian movies that I can see when I get there. He said, “Don’t you want to see Madonna?” After seeing pictures of her in those crazy “I’m a director so take me seriously” clothes I just knew that the movie about Wallis Simpson, “W.E.” that she premiered at Venice would blow.

Remember when she went around speaking with that fake British accent? Maybe she’s still doing it, for all I know. I haven’t really paid much attention to her, anyway, but she’s still, obviously got a thing for the UK; she decided, for some incomprehensible reason, to remake “The King’s Speech.”

Actually, even though it covers a lot of the same territory as “The King’s Speech”, it focuses more on Wallis and Edward and the reviews were, to be fair, “mixed”. One reviewer said she was a “sitting duck” and that everyone was ready to criticize her before they’d even seen it. Other reviewers talked of its “extraordinary silliness”, called it a “strange concoction”, said that it has “more style than substance” and that “it cannot be redeemed.”

My personal favorite: Todd McCarthy, for the Hollywood Reporter said, “The film most closely resembles a sumptuous documentary about a young beauty on an exclusive shopping expedition.”

You can see for yourself when it opens in the US December 9. Me? I just want to see Cristina Comencini’s “Quando La Notte” with Filippo Timi and I’d love to go to the Golden Lion for Lifetime Achievement Awards Ceremony ( Bernardo Bertolucci will award Marco Bellocchio the Golden Lion for Lifetime Achievement 2011) and the “Controcampo” Awards Ceremony. I may have entirely missed seeing “Terreferma”, which would be a huge drag, but there is still too much for me to see, and of course, you’ll hear more than you really want to about it while I’m there.

Filippo is pretty good-looking; don’t you agree?

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